Julie Through the Glass

Does anyone remember this commercial from the early- to mid-1980's?  I've thought about it dozens of times since our first child (a daughter) was born.  Today I went to the hospital to visit a friend whose first baby (a daughter) was born this week.  I couldn't help but feel the tiniest bit blue about how quickly the years have flown. (Emphasize tiny, since each season has beautiful parts, and I have loved them all.)  Briana bought a wedding dress last week.  It hardly seems possible to be here already!

Julie Through the Glass

Look What Briana Got Last Night!

Our daughter is engaged!!!!!

1. How is it possible that she is old enough for this?
2. How is it possible that I am old enough for this?
3. FAQ's:  Tyler. 25. Student a year away from a Business Management degree. July 5.  Yes, we're happy.

Because of Him

Do I Go Straight To Excited?

So, I FINALLY finished that MBA in November.  That meant that it was time to start looking for work, and I was DETERMINED to leave the company I presently work for.

Then one day my dear friend--a former supervisor in my present corporation--called me to come to her office.  She told me she was retiring and that I should apply for her job.  The whole time she's talking I'm thinking about how much I love the people there and how 4 years ago her job would have been my dream job; and also about how in the past 3 years I've gotten SO fed up with the glass ceiling at my work.  She was probably really confused about how non-committal I was.

BUT I left her office and walked straight to the office of the director of the division (who I know), where we had a nice conversation that actually included the possibility of growth opportunities (Twilight Zone!).  So when the job was posted, I applied.

I interviewed for the position just before Christmas, and they hoped to make a decision immediately.  I felt good about the interview, but I saw the resume of one other person, and she was and is fabulous.  Over the subsequent weekend, I knew that that job was not mine.  I was disappointed, but I was grateful that I got to deal with the disappointment privately.

The hiring manager kept in contact with me every few days, letting me know that the decision still had not been made.  After a couple of weeks, he came up to visit with me shortly in the cafeteria; and as he walked away, I had the feeling that I WAS going to get the job.  It was strange because I really wasn't being just pessimistic before.  I had known that the job wasn't mine.

In the meantime, I had applied for another job--with another corporation--and it was for the job I have DREAMED of having for over a decade.  I received a call asking me to come for an interview.  But now I was SURE I was going to be offered the job at my company and that they were on a pretty strict timeline because my friend is retiring.  So for a couple of days I stewed and prayed and thought and talked to family.  And I came to the very calm conclusion that if they offered me the position, I would accept it.

This past Thursday I received an appointment request to meet with my friend and the hiring manager.  His words were, "The bad news is that we are not offering you the job you applied for.  The good news is that we have another job we ARE offering you."  It turns out that upper management decided--after the interviews--that they wanted to restructure the job rather than having it as it has been for the past years.  They did that during the weekend when I KNEW that I was not getting the job.  The restructure came together and was approved this past Monday, the same day that I KNEW I was getting the job.  What they decided to do was take two jobs, throw them together, and assign the duties from those two jobs to two different people.  So that woman who I was sure would be great?  She is getting one portion of the job.  She gets the more technical side of things:  running reports, keeping databases current, and overseeing technical support for the employees of that division.  I will be doing the more supervisory/managerial stuff and some technical writing.

Hiring two different people, however, meant that there needed to be approval to hire them both at the higher level they had advertised; and THAT requires managing director approval.  Enter our managing director, who used to be the director of the division for which I was applying to work.  He's a brat.  He's a bully.  He's a diva.  He and I have a courteous relationship, but he knows that I don't love him.  But in less than two hours the hiring manager went from an email to me that said, "We've hit a snag," to sending me the meeting appointment to offer me a job.  Our managing director had not even hesitated to sign the approval when he learned it was me they were talking about.

I accepted the position offered to me.  I'm very happy about the opportunities to do new things and learn new things.  I thanked my managing director for his goodness to me in this particular case (that was actually a really nice conversation).  I went down to my new office and did several hours of training on Friday.  I announced my new job to the people in my current division.  I cancelled my interview with the other company.

And with all of this, I wouldn't say I am excited.  I'm happy, yes.  I'm anticipating.  But mostly I'm calm, and that is a wonderful, wonderful feeling.

Yesterday Briana and I went to the temple.  After we had performed our service there, I walked over to the prayer roll to enter some names.  As I stood there I had clear recollections of two different friends who--during the course of the past couple of weeks--had put my name on the prayer roll when they've attended the temple.  And now I know that I am calm because of the tender mercies of the Lord.  He has been giving me gentle care all along, and I am incredibly thankful for His watchcare and for the beautiful blessing of wonderful friends.

From the Deseret News and My Commentary:

Q: What should I do about this situation?

My parents surprised us with the news that they’re leaving The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the church they raised us in. They love the gospel, but feel like the people in their ward mistreat them, and have always mistreated them, and I guess this is the only solution they can think of.

Now my older siblings are angry with them (my parents) and have decided that if they don’t go back to church, then they (my siblings) won’t go home for the holidays. My parents are very hurt, and this is just hardening their hearts even more. I want to go home and I want everyone else to be there too, my siblings, their kids, it’s not home without all of us — even if things are tense.

I’ve voiced this opinion to my siblings who have said that if I go home it’s like I’m condoning their actions, which makes me “just as bad as they are.” I’m not happy about my parents' decision, but regardless, I love them and really look forward to my school breaks so that I can see them. 

A: (From Angela, at Deseret News)

Man, your siblings are being really harsh. I could write a bunch of flowery stuff about how I’m sure they’re hurting and this must be a difficult adjustment period for your family but “Just as bad as they are?” Really? Ouch.

Don’t listen to them.

Go home and love and enjoy your parents. Support them, make breakfast with them, watch TV with them, teach them about Twitter and complain about the government shutdown with them. Take moments to try to uplift them where they are weak but show them that your love for them “never faileth.”

I just read your question again and “condoning” is really an interesting word choice on the part of your siblings. In a way, you are condoning your parents’ behavior. You’re allowing them to live and struggle (as is often the case in life) without condemning them for it.

The best thing you can do is remain a positive, influential and wonderful part of their lives.

Don't be angry with your siblings, either. Pray for the power not to take offense. Hopefully your siblings will follow your example.

***

To me, the WHOLE POINT of earthly existence is to learn to love (not just the feeling, but the action).  I realize that we needed a body and there are tests.  But God could have created billions of tiny little worlds and said, “Right now it’s Aundrea’s turn.  After her, it will be Briana’s turn,” and we would all have had bodies and ready-made tests.  But no.  He put us into families first and into a world FILLED with people.  Why?  So we could figure out how to get along with people, and ultimately, get along with Love.  That is the Savior’s great example.

I recently had a conversation with Landon about this very thing.  He is concerned about his choices because of what I will think of him or how I will treat him.  I’m glad of that.  If “My mom would be disappointed” keeps him from making poor choices, I’m glad.  But I reassured him that NOTHING he ever does will make me stop loving him.  Ever.  I might be hurt, angry, or disappointed; but I will NEVER stop loving him. 

Therefore (and I didn’t voice this part), if going to church (or not going) becomes a fight, it is a battle he will win.  I never want the Church or anything else to come between the love Landon and I have for each other.  So far he pouts a bit, but he doesn’t fight us about going to church.  If he starts fighting, I will cave.  It’s just not worth it.  The fight would make it a war I am unwilling to engage in.

The two most important things in my life (which aren’t things, of course) are my family and the gospel of Jesus Christ, which includes my membership in the Church.  I want those two things to be interrelated; but if they are not, it will not stop either of them from being important to ME.

I love you!

Aundrea

Latest Pinterest Project

What was pinned

What I did

These cute little guys went to our missionary in Calgary.  They're filled with goodies.  :)

2013 -- The Year of AwesoME. Part 2

I had three large goals for this year:  run a half marathon, hike the Grand Canyon rim to rim, and graduate with my MBA.

You should know that I am not an athlete.  I never have been an athlete.  I never will be an athlete.  If it involves, throwing, catching, hitting, jumping, running, kicking or anything else that involves any kind of coordination, I cannot do it.  Really.  I can't.  I'm one big clumsy oaf.

Nor is my body a thing of beauty.  Don't get me wrong.  I love my body.  But there is nothing remarkable about me physically.  I am not beautiful.  I don't have long sinewy legs.  I've never been particularly lean (though I've also never been particularly fat).  I'm just basically a very nice average person.

Does anyone wonder, then, why two of my goals were so physical?  Besides me, I mean.

Well, y'all, guess what?  I finished #2 this week!

Here's a little timeline:

June 2012 -- Janece tells me about Phantom Ranch and how it is a bucket list item of hers to hike the Grand Canyon rim to rim.  So I say, "I would do that with you!"

July 2012 -- Janece says she is going to try to get reservations for Phantom, but they are taken 13 months in advance.  I tell her to count us in (see how I did that to Spencer?).

August 2012 -- After 1 1/2 hours of dialing and re-dialing, Janece finally gets hold of Phantom Ranch to try to get reservations for September 2013.  They are already sold out.

September 2012 -- Janece and two other friends spend the morning dialing and re-dialing, and Laurie gets reservations for nine of us for October 2013.

January to September 2013 -- I run nearly every day.

June to October 2013 -- Janece and I climb 32 flights of stairs twice a week.

July 2013 -- Janece, Spencer, Landon, Devin (Landon's friend), and I climb Mt. Olympus.  I wonder what I was thinking to agree to do this.

September 2013 -- I successfully run a half marathon.

October 1, 2013 -- The U.S. Government "shuts down."  All national parks are closed until the government leaders can somehow reach agreement about the national budget.  Arizona and Utah top the states who offer to pay to keep their national parks open.  Eventually the federal government gives permission for this to happen, but it will only be in effect till October 18.  Finally the government shutdown ends, and we are a "Go" for the Grand Canyon!

Friday, October 18, 2013 -- Aundrea gets an infection, sees the doctor, and starts taking antibiotics, which are marked "Avoid direct sunlight while taking this medication."  We purchase two backpacks (I know, nothing like preparedness, right?) and trail food.  We pack till nearly midnight.

Saturday, October 19, 2013 -- Spencer and I left home at 7:15 a.m. so we could be at Janece's by 8:00.  We put our packs and our bodies into her Toyota Corolla and headed for Arizona.  We stopped for a little bit at the Best Friends animal shelter, which I think our kids would enjoy seeing.  We didn't go see all the animals, but we watched their video and just had a nice rest stop.  From there we drove to Jacob Lake.  Janece and her brother, Scott, drove to the North Rim of the Grand Canyon for the sunset, while Spencer and I hung out and then had dinner with our "son," Logan Gifford.  We went to bed once we'd looked at the stars, taken some pictures, bought me a new pink coat, and played a couple of rounds of Hollywood Rummy.  I think it was 8:30 when we called it a night.

Sunday, October 20, 2013 -- We reloaded Janece's car, then Spencer, Scott, and I went into Jacob Lake lodge for a nice breakfast.  As soon as breakfast was over, we drove to the North Rim Kaibab Trail entrance.  Janece's car said it was 29 degrees outside.  We bundled up in coat and gear, and got onto the trail around 8:45 a.m.  Then we walked.  We took pictures.  Repeat a lot.

Seven miles from the trail head we stopped at Cottonwood Campground for lunch.  It was about 1:00 p.m.  We knew we had a very slow pace, so Janece and I decided that in the interest of safety it would be better if she and I just stayed on the main trail to Phantom Ranch.  Scott and Spencer, however, really wanted to go to Ribbon Falls.  So they took off together, while we girls stuck together.  The boys caught back up to us, and I have say that I was really starting to be fatigued.

Finally I realized that if I let it go much longer I was not going to be in good shape.  So I said to Spencer, "I am very fatigued.  My legs don't want to move.  I just want to curl up here and go to sleep, but I know it would not be good to be stuck here in the dark.  I am mildly nauseated.  Help me know what to do."  We stopped and he had me eat some dried apricots.  He looked at my legs, and they were EXTREMELY red and sore, like sunburn, only I'd been in long pants all day.  We figured that the medication for my infection had probably caused some of that, exacerbated by my knee braces.  Spencer wanted to massage my legs, but it was like rubbing sandpaper on a sunburn.  Then we plodded on.  Spencer took some of the articles from my pack and put them into his.  We walked for a very long time.  And then we walked some more.  Spencer would call ahead to me, "Take a drink, Babe," or "Have another apricot."  I got feeling quite a bit better, but I was seriously so tired!  At 6:15 we hiked into Phantom Ranch.

Our dinner was at 6:30.  They fed us stew, cornbread, and salad.  And chocolate cake.  Everyone talked about how delicious it was.  I know the stew was pretty spiced with pepper and bay leaf, but it was all I could do to lift a spoon to my mouth.  :)  Once dinner was over, I went to our dorm, took a quick shower, and went. to. bed.

Monday, October 21, 2013 -- At 4:30 a.m. a Phantom Ranch employee knocked on our door with a 4:30 a.m. wake-up call.  A few people got up then for 5:00 a.m. breakfast.  I went back to sleep.  At 6:30 Phantom Ranch rang the 6:30 breakfast bell.  I went back to sleep.  :)

When I finally got up, I took my time getting ready for the day, then went to the men's dorm for Spencer, who also had just gotten up.  We ate some breakfast together, then did some wandering.  Except for my sore, faux-sunburned legs, I was tender but doing much better.  We visited with the other members of our group, who did their hike south-to-north.  John and Shauna used to be in the ward Janece lived in.  Laurie is Shauna's sister and Rich is Laurie's husband.  Laurie and Rich live in Montana.  It was nice to make new friends, but the four of them stayed grouped for things while Janece, Scott, Spencer, and I made up another group.

That afternoon all eight of us decided to take the River Trail hike, which was only a couple of miles and not strenuous.  We passed some Hopi Indian ruins as well as the only sanctioned burial in the Grand Canyon (a man who was killed during a blast while making the trail).  We hiked along the Bright Angel Creek to the Colorado River, over the Black Bridge, downriver a ways (we watched a river run trip for a few minutes), across the Silver Bridge, and back to camp.

We sent postcards to our kids (they haven't arrived yet), had some "Lemmy" (Phantom Ranch's lemonade) and some M&M's.  Then, blessing of all blessings! Spencer made arrangements for the mules to take my pack out of the Grand Canyon the next day.  We put as much of our gear into my pack as we could, leaving his for water and last items we needed to carry.  We filled all our water packs (Camelbacks and hand-held water bottles) so we were completely ready for the next day.  We went to a fun ranger talk which was formatted like a game of Jeopardy, where we learned a lot.  We went to Bright Angel Creek and soaked our feet in the numbingly cold water (it was HEAVENLY).  We had a lovely and much more lively steak dinner at the Ranch.

Tuesday, October 22 -- We had gone to bed early again.  Scott and Spencer had the 5:00 a.m. breakfast, but Janece and I opted to eat our trail food and get on the road, knowing the men would catch us before we were very far.  She and I dropped my pack off for the mules, then turned on our headlamps and took off.  It was still full night when we left at 5:15ish, and it was seriously beautiful to watch the stars and the moon as we walked.  The men caught us just as we had decided it was light enough for us to turn off our headlamps.  Spencer and I stopped for a picture of the river, and both Scott and Janece were long gone.  Scott was a VERY fast hiker.  He made it out of the canyon in about 4.5 hours.  We thought we would catch up with Janece, but she never appeared, so we figured she had made it up ahead of us.  It turned out that we had passed her while she was in a restroom or something.  We beat her to the top by about 2 hours (it took us about 6 hours even).

You guys, this hike was in.cred.i.ble.  The bottom half (4.5 miles) was uphill with a few strenuous stretches and switchbacks, but nothing too hard.  But the view!  And we had the blessing of doing this as the sun came up into the canyon, illuminating it piece by piece.  We kept thinking we'd have to turn a corner and we'd lose our view, but no.  Each time we turned a switchback, we'd look and have our breath taken away again.  It was seriously so beautiful that we kept trying to find words to describe it, and nothing seemed like enough.  Majestic.  Awesome.  Breath-taking. Expansive.  Vast.  Glorious.  Huge.  Beautiful.  Gorgeous.  Amazing.  There's just nothing that adequately described it.

Wednesday, October 24 --  We caught a shuttle back to the North Rim (where our car was).  That took 4.5 hours.  We drove an hour back to Jacob Lake for lunch, then started the 5 hour journey home.  Arrived back to our safe family, lovely home, and my blessed pillow!  :)

I'm so grateful we went on this trip!  Actually, more than anything, this feels like a gratitude trip for me.  What a lovely world we live in!  I'm so glad we had the means to do this (both economically and physically), and I'm so glad the park was re-opened just in time.  Our weather could not have been more perfect, and the autumn colors with the colors of the rock were all splendid.  The stars were out in full force, and we saw the Milky Way for the first time in MONTHS.  We had beds, bedding, toilets and showers.  Everyone was well, including me.  Part of me is a little disappointed in myself for not being able to pack everything all the time.  Most of all, though, I'm so grateful for my sweetheart, who never abandoned me, who never made me feel like I was a burden, who quietly and graciously took care of me.  We laughed together.  We worked together.  We took pictures and laughed some more.  We played games.  We oo'd and ahh'd over the amazing gift that we had to be on this trip.  We talked about our kids.  We prayed together.  It was a glorious, glorious trip in every single way.  I'm so glad we did both rims.  I'm so glad we spent a full day in the bottom of the canyon.  I was so grateful to not have that infection (because of antibiotics), and I was so grateful for the freezing cold water on my burning legs (because of antibiotics).

They felt as nasty as they look!

We saw a fox in camp.  During our hike in, Janece and I saw one of the large Kaibab squirrels.  We saw a ringtail in camp (not even scared of us at all, of course).  We saw deer and elk and even a blue bird.  We saw agave and yucca and other cacti.  We saw wild flowers and millions of trees and shrubs and grasses.  We saw ancient American pictographs.  We met people from all over the world (Japan, Germany, Australia, Britain, France, Canada, Mexico, and MANY places in the US).  And seriously, you just can't believe the expanse, the vastness, or the majesty of the Grand Canyon till you see it.  Seriously, people.  Pictures can't do it justice.

Also, I'm not a photographer.  Just hand me a PHD (push here, dummy) camera, and you get what you get. Here's some of what I got.

Scott, Janece, me, Spencer

At our cabin at Jacob Lake.  I love this man!

Spencer, me, Logan

This is maybe my favorite of all the pix I got.  This is Janece.

North rim 

I was enthralled by the water, and wanted a picture of this...

...but my husband photo-bombed the picture!

Daddy, can you see the face?

Another favorite picture.  Look at the colors!

Gravesite near Phantom Ranch

Indian ruins along River Trail

The Colorado River

More pictures in another post.  Blogger's fighting me right now.

Anyone Can Run A (Stupid) Mile!

Yesterday I returned home to find a card addressed to me.  I did not recognize the address.  When I opened it, I found:

CONGRATULATIONS!

Studies have shown that a very small percentage of the world's population can run 13.1 miles.

(We're so proud to know one of them!)

This wonderful card came from my friend's mother.  She is a fabulous person, and her assertion that anyone can run a mile has become a mantra for me while I'm running.  I think she's a nut, because NOT anyone can run a mile.  But if she says so, I probably can.  :)

Yay!

I am the Primary chorister in our ward.  I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this calling.  It's seriously the dream calling, which I didn't appreciate when I had it 25 years ago, so I thought I'd never again get to do it.  And then I got called and I just wanted to turn cartwheels all the way home.

We only have about 30 children in our Primary.  It's small, and if any family is gone, we feel the hurt in our numbers.  The good news is that I know all 30 of those wonderful young people, and no kidding, I just adore them.  I don't think their parents could possible love them any more than I do (maybe as much, but not more).

After our opening exercises, Brother C and I go to nursery for singing time in there.  They are just babies, mostly, but after just two months they are already beginning to open up to me.  They already ADORE Brother C, who loves them back and who takes the lead during nursery.  After nursery we go back to Primary for the last couple of minutes of Sharing Time.

Yesterday Sister A finished Sharing Time and said, "Okay, let's get ready for singing time!"  About three little voices all said, "Yay!"  Annie said, "It's just so fun!"

First of all, the children can't have any more fun than I am having.  Going to Primary is not a job--it's play time!  I love the children.  I love the music.  We play games.  We talk about the gospel.  We feel the spirit of the Lord.

Secondly, every person ought to have the kind of support in their callings that I get in mine.  Not only does the Primary presidency love me, but the kids call out, "Yay!" when I get there.

What if we all gave a shout when someone performed their calling?

It should happen to everyone at least once, I think.

Channeling. Or Something.

On my dad's side of the family, I am the oldest grandchild.  Until I was nearly 4 1/2, I was the only granddaughter.  To say I was loved and spoiled by my grandma would be a huge understatement.  She adored me her whole life, and I loved her, too.

Grandma was a fabulous person.  She could make a feast out of leftovers.  She was an amazing musician, playing piano by ear beginning when she was just 3 years old.  She loved Lawrence Welk.  She loved Rose Milk (which was a hand lotion advertised during the Lawrence Welk show).  She always kept Jergen's and Rose Milk at the sink in the kitchen and in the bathroom.  Anyone could use the Jergen's, but the Rose Milk was hers alone.  She smelled like roses.

Grandpa had built a little playhouse for my aunt (who is just 6 years my senior), and only the girls were allowed to play in there.  My cousin and I spent HOURS at a time in that little playhouse.  Grandma would come to the door multiple times while we were playing.  One time she's have fresh lipstick on and her purse over her arm.  She was the Avon lady, and she'd come sit on the "couch" (a bench seat from a car) and rub lotion into our hands or apply lipstick or eye shadow to our faces.  One time she'd put on her apron (truthfully, she probably already had it on) and bring us lunch to eat at the little table.  One time she'd just be Grandma, coming over to visit her "ladies."

My grandma got cancer when I was just a young girl.  It seemed like she was sick and old for a very long time.  She was only 73 when she died in 1996.  I was sad to lose my sweet grandma, but I was glad she wasn't sick and weak any more.

My grandma had her temple recommend renewed just a week or two before she died.  She was unable to attend the temple, but it was important to have her recommend.  I think of her each time I renew my recommend.

My grandma was the world's greatest penpal.  She literally had hundreds of pen friends, back in the days before email.  She was my penpal, too.  Starting when I was a little girl (maybe 7 or 8 years old), we exchanged letters.  Hers were always filled with the happenings of the day:  she hung the laundry, she had her hair done, she went visiting teaching, she played the piano at a funeral, etc., etc.  It was fun to get her letters because you felt like you had been standing right there in her kitchen for the day.  Grandma kept writing clear till she died.  The last letters and cards I received were illegible, but they meant the world to me because I knew she was thinking of me.

Grandma took a walk every day.  When I was little she'd walk around the block.  When her health started to decline, she'd walk to the corner and back.  After a while, it was to the end of the driveway and back.  At the end, she walked to the back door and back.  I admire the fact that she never stopped living until she died, even though it would have been easy to curl up in bed.  She took a walk every day.

Grandma was the tidiest woman you'll ever meet, almost to a fault.  She was also very thrifty.  Grandma's whole body shook when she laughed.  She loved her children and grandchildren.  I inherited my hairy arms through my dad from my grandma (I hated that as a kid.  Now I don't really care.).  She'd invite me to come sit on her lap till I was about 12 years old.  Grandma loved to read, and she passed that to my dad, and he (and Mom) passed it on to me.  Grandma could sing alto and tenor.

I was pregnant with Landon when Grandma died.  Our children don't really remember her, and the memories Briana has are of a scary old lady.  That makes me sad, but it's understandable.

When Grandma had been gone for 6 or 8 months, I sat down at the piano one day to play.  That day I could feel my grandma all around me, and honestly, I could miss a note if I tried.  I hadn't played that well in AGES, and I've never played that well since.  It was a beautiful and sacred moment in time to sit privately with my grandma and the music.  While there have been times when I wouldn't be surprised to learn she was there, I've never felt her presence that strongly since then.

Until the past few days.  Nothing really extraordinary is happening, but I just feel her here with me every once in a while throughout the day.  It's a lovely, loving feeling.