I Was Gonna, But...

I had planned to bring the camera to work so I could show you our fabulous Hawaiian vacation.  But it turns out that even after a glorious vacation, I am still brain dead.  I forgot the camera.

Instead I will tell you a story:

When I was 21 years old I went to the student health center at the university I was attending.  There in the student health center, I peed into a cup (which is more information than you ever wanted to know, but that is what happened).

The next day I received a call from the student health center.  The doctor wanted to see me.

If a doctor calls you into his office, it is never good news.  I was worried.  What could they possibly find in my pee? 

So I left one of my classes midway through so that I could go see the doctor.  He was in a large office with a VERY large wooden desk.  He laced his fingers together and said solemnly, "You are pregnant."  I was sort of waiting for the punchline.  "You are pregnant AND you are dying."  But nope.  That was it.  Just "You are pregnant."

When I realized that that was all he had called me in to tell me, I wanted to jump up and down and scream for joy.  But--ya know--I was a very mature 21-year-old.  So I smiled and thanked him for the wonderful news.

The doctor's eyebrows went into his hairline.  He said, "Is this good news?"

Isn't it a sad social commentary that telling someone they are about to have a baby is a bad thing?

I assured him that it was VERY good news.  He said, "I've been working here for nearly 20 years, and it is NEVER good news."

Except this time it was good news.  And a few months later we had a beautiful, perfect baby daughter.  My life has never been the same.

Today--a mere 15 seconds later, it seems--my beautiful, perfect baby is moving.

The end.