Years ago, when our children were very little, I was quite concerned about what would happen to them if we died. We ended up purchasing burial plots at that time, but we haven't done anything further. With Spencer being SO involved with his dad now this his mom died, he's now the one who is concerned about taking care of our funeral and mortuary arrangements.
As pertaining to the care of my body--I DO NOT WANT TO BE EMBALMED. Seriously, the thought of their filling me with formaldehyde or any other chemical grosses me out. I know I'll be dead and I won't really care, but can't we just put me in the ground and call it good? For me, this is not about being green or saving money. It's just gross, because bodies are just shells of human beings, so why do we have to dress them up and make them up? In the end, they just look dead--BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT THEY ARE.
This is not to say that bodies are gross or scary. Neither of those applies. It's just that I receive no comfort from a body. The best time to speak with the family of the deceased is at the viewing, but I really don't want to view, ya know?
Anyway, several years ago I heard about green burials (you can read more here, if you care), and I really like the idea. At the time I first heard of them, no cemeteries in Utah were involved. But not too long ago I looked again, and there is one cemetery (it's in Bountiful) that is doing green burials. They had a booth at the State Fair, so we made an appointment to go visit with their salesman, which we did this past Saturday.
Of course, there are many options available for both regular and green burials, including the possibility of cremation. We are in the process of deciding how we think it should all go for us and finding the funding to take care of that so that our children don't have to worry about it.
Here are some other things (just for me):
- "Joy to the World" by Voice Male (or our sons, if they choose to learn the harmonies) should be played to begin the service. Because I LOVE that hymn, and musically I love that version, that's why. The lyrics and the music are all about the Savior and the amazing JOY that was brought to the world by Him! And if you can't smile during Voice Male's version, you're missing out on one of the great joys of life. Seriously. You should go listen to it right now.
- I'd like my brother, Derek, to speak. He's known me since childhood, but he'll also teach the gospel. Because if it's not about the gospel, it's not really about my life.
- Make sure the gospel of Jesus Christ is taught. If you can use my life as an example of something, please do. But it should be ALL about the hope and joy the gospel brings, not only for a glorious future, but for the meaning it gives us DAILY.
- Joanne Soderborg at the organ, please. She's amazing, and I love her, and she loves me back.
- Make sure Spencer is involved with as much as he can be, but protect his heart carefully. He's as fine a man as I've ever known, and he's taken care of me in every possible way. Also, encourage him to find someone to love for the rest of his life. The world is a better place because of people like Spencer who have such a capacity to love.
- If our kids want to speak or participate, they can; if they don't want to, please don't make them. But make sure everyone knows my family is my joy. And kids, if you do speak or sing, make sure to reference #3.
- If the bishop can't keep it short and say "amen," hold the funeral at the mortuary. It's worth the money to not have it go too long or to have him make a sermon just to hear his own voice. If it's still Bishop Soderborg, we should be OK. (But no stake presidency! Because sheesh!)
- If you want a musical number, my favorites are Aunt Gloria and Kaylani on the piano and organ doing "How Great Thou Art," the Heritage 3rd ward Primary and friends singing "Gethsemane," or Sterling Singers doing "In Remembrance." I'm also fine with congregational singing of hymns. But not "O My Father," "Because I Have Been Given Much," or "I Believe In Christ," OK? I love their messages, but I don't love these hymns. If our choir kids (Brit, Jordan, Lisa, Anna, Chris, Colton, Tanar, Craig, Logan, Landon, Raylee, etc.) want to sing, I'd love them forever. Oh, wait. I'll already love them forever! Just sing about the Savior, my loves.